Had an interesting call the other day. And like I promised you ma’am, here are tips on how to keep us men interested.
Hold your horses though, is the man in your life married to you?
Committed, exclusive relationship?
The parameters shift in direct proportion to your answers.
Largely though, these tips work for most situations. But they are are loosely compiled for married folk… (Chiagozie, yes, that is a disclaimer. Lol)
Are you losing him? True women know what I mean. Pseudo-women are notoriously clueless to the sign, and then wonder what happened or what the other woman has that she doesn’t.
Is he spending more time elsewhere? Despite being in the same room with you?
Are you living with a shadow of him, a ‘shell’ of the man you once knew?
Did you hurt him?
Lovers spat perhaps?
Or just waning lust?
Either way, these, or some of these may help:-
Be spontaneous. Shock him, awe him, make plans for the evening or plan an entire elaborate date by yourself. Surprise him and never be too predictable.
Don’t change yourself. Stay true to the real person that you are. Don’t change yourself, change however, your personality. Be dynamic, but stick to who you are. It’s frankly easier. And honest.
Take initiatives in bed. Your guy may like taking control in bed, but when you show creativity, you may leave him in awe of your confidence and sexiness.
Smell great all the time. Always smell great around him but don’t overpower subtle fragrances with sickly sweet perfumes though. Always smell good, and pay special attention to your personal hygiene and body odor.
Learn to seduce him. Seduction doesn’t stop in bed. Be sexy around him and be creative wherever you go.
Show interest in his hobbies. A guy would absolutely love a girl who shows interest in his special hobbies, be it playing on his Xbox or climbing a mountain. Men want to spend their lives with a woman who truly understands them and connects to them.
Don’t be a drama queen. It’s alright to throw a fussy fit now and then if your guy disrespects you. But no matter what, don’t exaggerate a situation or blow it out of proportion just to prove a point. Guys can see through the acts of even the best drama queens.
Be his shoulder to lean on. Give him your strength and support when he’s low on morale. Reassure him and help him confide his problems to you. Be his confidant and his warm pillow when he’s in the dumps and he’ll treat you like a goddess.
Be his arm candy. Look good in his arms when both of you are together. Get a new hairstyle now and then, look fashionable and classy and he’ll never want you to leave his arms.
Be financially secure. Be in control of your finances and have a well settled job. Guys love a girl with a steady head on her shoulders. At the same time, they stay a mile away from careless spendthrifts!
Have intelligent conversations. A guy may want an arm candy when he’s on the streets, but he also wants a lover who can communicate with him and have intelligent conversations at the end of the day.
Win over his family. Guys are attached to their families and a few guys are even loyal mama’s boys. Make his family and friends think you’re a catch and he’ll definitely love you more.
Help him deal with life. Men may behave like the saviors of the world. But inside, they’re still little boys who need a cuddle and a hug now and then. Help your man deal with the issues life throws at him.
Public display of affection. Your man may shy away from a bit of PDA, but he still loves it when you cling to his arms like a damsel in distress. It makes him feel more powerful and sexy!
Stroke his ego. If you want to keep your guy interested and happy, learn to stroke his ego. Compliment his achievements and give him a pat on his back when he’s proud of something. Make him feel like a man and he’ll stay your man.
Be independent and dependent. Confused? Be dependent when you’re with him. Be independent when you’re by yourself. It’ll make him feel more like a man when you’re around without really feeling like you’re needy when he’s busy doing something else.
Be happy and interesting. Be interesting and creative with your life. See the happy side in everything, even in the most mundane of days. When you’re an optimist, your infectious happiness will definitely rub on to him.
Don’t make him feel insecure. Flirt with others and talk to men, but never at the cost of his insecurity. When he’s around, hug him close and he’ll swell with affection for you. No stories of your exes. Stay loyal. And oh… Do not…I repeat, do not, betray his confidence(s) in you. You will be emotionally (and eventually physically) replaced if you do.
Be smart and classy. Don’t ask stupid questions. Guys may like a dumb bimbette at first, but they’re not looking for a long term relationship with them.
Don’t be clingy and needy. Guys like a damsel who needs their help. But that stops once the infatuation period is over. Show him that you’re self reliant and he’ll always look for ways to help you and please you.
Be sexually innovative. Know your moves in bed and everywhere else. Have sex in different places, role play with him, wear an apron and nothing else while cooking something special, tie his hands to the bedpost, or vice versa… You get the drift, don’t you?
Be a good cook. No matter what people say, the adage, the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach still holds good. I’m an exception to that rule though… But it works generally.
Make him proud of you. Guys may be shallow at first sight, but they still want a girl they can respect and admire. Be an achiever and a girl he can look up to in awe.
Respect yourself. You’re not a doormat. Let him know that you have the strength to move on if he treats you badly.
Don’t play “games”. It becomes obvious when a woman is playing coy. The repercussions are usually dire, albeit fatal.
Don’t play hard to get.
Jealousy? Hmmm…! Please don’t. He may kill you.
Don’t test his love. Have faith.
Don’t test his commitment. His patience or his resolve. Just be loving… Or not. Emotions are not to be played with.
Make him dependent on you. As long as he thinks he can’t live without you or if he feels helpless without you, he’ll always stay dependent on you.
Pick the traits you can use and you’ll see how easy it can be to keep a guy interested in you. But never let him use you or treat you like a pushover.
Earn his respect and love. And let him earn yours. Treat him with love and affection, even if he does not deserve it. Have a timeframe though… If he does not thaw or change, respect yourself and take leave of the moron.