When your lips spoke
Things you should only think
How my heart broke.
I wonder at the damage done
Everyday I see the signs
Another reason to be gone.
Lol, I am now the student
My lessons taught to me
Their education (though) absent.
I must have severely hurt you
Resentment thinly concealed
Vengeance truly becomes you.
I had to kill you
So you would not die
Now in your hereafter
I hope you found paradise.
Are you at peace?
Though what is dead cannot die
Your dying haunts my living
But that which lives ultimately dies.
Your cries for help sadden me
Not because you call from a grave;
Where you are is bleak and desolate
You should have called sooner.
I had to kill him
So you would not die
Now in our forever after
I know you have found paradise.
Here we sit, oars in hand
Each paddling in their direction
I am stronger so we go my way
When I wane we go yours
Consequently we end still.
So here we sit; nothing gained…
Here we lay, blanket o’er us
Back to back, pillow between
It is cold, we are cold
You roll your way, I roll mine
So blanket ends o’er pillow.
So here we lay; nothing gained…
Here we walk, chained together
I am brisk but you stroll
Destiny ordained, our paces wrong
I pull, you tug; you yank, I stall
Inevitably it is a tug of war.
So here we stand; nothing gained…
Something happened to me recently. Not directly, I was a second-party casualty.
An innocent bystander and unfortunate recipient of the “cock up”. The unfortunate series of circumstances got to me. And got me thinking.
I was perfectly situated to analyse this indecency.
I was there, just being human and making mistakes.
No, I didn’t kill anybody.
No one got hurt.
I did not physically harm anyone.
The psychological harm alleged were arguable, and in my humble opinion, bogus.
The issue?
Because of my affiliation with one who had lost credibility, I was starting to lose respect and credibility too.
For the sake of peace and the discouraging of murderous genes dormant in some of my ‘friends’, let me leave the issue as I have diplomatically stated it.
My point is salient regardless of which end you are on.
I hope these “carbuncles” help…
1) Causing More Trouble Than Your Worth
Take a critical review of who you really are. Are you realistically worth fighting for?
Positive affirmations and faith aside, are you worth the drama or trouble you cause?
You see, consistently being an ass devalues your person. Reduces you to mere memories. You’re like the chubby niece or nephew, good for a once in a while indulgence. Mostly avoided.
2) Keep Talking; Incessantly
“… In the multitude of words, sin is not lacking…”
“Draw near to listen…”
You do not need to be heard always and/or on every subject.
No one is really interested in your troubles ultimately. You see even close family will sometimes only indulge you by listening to you whine, ONLY because your complaints make you less of a superhuman and more like they are.
Everyone has their issues.
So it’s pleasant for them to listen to you prove to them that “the rich also cry”.
Better still, your yakking bolsters their self-esteem because when listening to your clueless renditions, they can ascertain that they are better than you.
Priceless!!
3) Status Quo; (The Mess We Are In)
Have a gentleman where I work that calls himself ” the king of the poor”.
The gentleman in question has sunk from poverty to penury. Stopping always at bankruptcy for a fistful of ‘poor’.
Eagles do not roost, they soar. It is chickens that roost.
Choose to behave like a chicken and clamour and scratch and scrape… Or an eagle… Majestic, enigmatic, big, strong, reliable.
It’s up to you. Common-ise yourself or otherwise.
4) Snitch On Yourself
“If you stopped telling your friends everything, then your enemy wouldn’t know so much about you.”
A snitch is like a rat.
Despicable.
Carrier of filth and disease.
Rats are better off elsewhere… Dead.
Relationships of any sort require confidentiality.
There are codes of conduct. Do not speak about anyone to anyone. But to that one.
Do not boast or gloat, it cheapens you.
If you are snitching on your beloved… You idiot! Leave them instead.
If you are snitching on your spouse… Your idiocy is stratospheric!!
I won’t dwell on this point, I find it annoying.
Sheeeesh!!!
5) Misplace Your Loyalties Or Priorities
Play your part. Play your position.
A carpenter is scarcely expected to be giving lectures on quantum physics at MIT.
Nor the good captain on British Airways expected to be serving cocktails mid flight.
Focus on your roles. If you do not know them, learn more.
As ignorance is no excuse in law, so there is no law against labeling the ignorant a ‘poor excuse’ of humanity.
It’s shabby and in poor taste when you are not on point.
You are not reliable.
Busy day tomorrow. I’m off!
I was at a wedding recently. I was moved to romantic heights.
It was a very refreshing event – after I woke up.
Before the romantics on board begin calling me “emotionally crippled,” something happened while I slept…yes, thank you for asking, I received a revelation. I accrued unto knowledge, an epiphany I know I am supposed to propagate.
The wedding was in Benin, Edo state. Nigeria. Hence the my partial rendition of this piece in the official Nigerian patois, “Broken English”.
For The Unmarried
1) Shine ya eye!
Good people abound. There are many lovely angels walking about pretending to be human. There is someone for everyone. Look closely is all I’m saying. Also, scrutinize! Not all that glitters is gold. Gold usually has to be discovered; laboured for, mined, cleaned, processed and then designed to look just like the goldsmith wants it to – beautiful.
2) Lion no dey born monkey!
Old habits die hard. Careful who you fall for. Oh please shut it! You can control who you fall for. Don’t even get me started on “love at first sight!” Thou evil and heartless generation! Opportunists!
I digress…apologies.
Hang around a bad person long enough, you would start to see the best side of them. Invariably start to accept them for who they are. Invariably start to accept bad things as the norm.
Funny thing about personalities is that opposites attract. Yet the very character that attracts two lovers, would be the same character that eventually causes friction. Usually enough to separate the lovers.
If you hang around questionable establishments, you will find questionable friends and maybe questionable love. More often than not, if they were pretending they revert to type down the road. With you in tow, my (now questionable) friend.
3) No carry ya wife do girlfriend
Do not treat a good woman badly. Do not toy with a good man either.
Many people lose out on love out of shortsightedness. They treat their best choices of suitable life partners shabbily – like a fling, and never quite get their groove back. Or the person back.
Reasons may range from over ambition, to greed, to bad advice, to immaturity, and to stupidity.
Its a personal judgement call. But a good person is a good person. The wise ones pursue potential in their choice of mates.
“Ready-made’s” are already set in stone, you will find that you’re soon caught between a rock and a hard place.
4) Handshake wey don reach elbow… No be handshake again.
Maybe you’ve found such a one? What in God’s name are you waiting for? Marry them for crying out loud! Commit to them my indecisive (and often, self centered) friend! Tell them how you feel. Show them how you feel. Do right by them and do the honorable thing.
Its been two years since they proposed, friend, return the ring. Except if your country is involved in war of some sort, and one party is drafted.
5) Una two no be pikin; couple yasef!
Ever notice that marriage is the only institution that gives you a certificate before graduation?
My point is that marriage is for life. Marriage is for serious minded people. It is not a status. It is not meant to be just romantic.
Many people treat their marriages like they’re dating and so experience boyfriend and girlfriend issues whilst married.
Grow up! Act your age. Play your part. If you do not understand marriage, do your research from holy books first. Please stop traumatising both families. The ripple effect of marital problems are far reaching. Stop worsening marriage statistics. Don’t let your poor choices misinform and ‘miseducate’ the willing.
If you don’t get it, please leave marriage alone till you do.
Nkpam! (Finish!)
It is true. Most of our loyal and dedicated fans and admirers are actually illegitimate.
It seems to beg the question, ”are the legitimate support complacent?” or do the illegitimate go the extra mile with the hope of attaining ‘legitimacy’? Or is the issue in the heart of the beloved of both?
Will the illegitimate end up complacent too…or will their ardor burn like the sun for as long as they live? Is all they seek legitimacy, and the current enthusiasm just ‘eye-service’ before diminishing returns or buyers remorse or Napoleons’ syndrome of post-victory depression make them stereotypical?
While they subtly hint and flirt; while their gaze and (erroneous) touch linger infinitely, you have to admit that it feels good to be wanted. While they overtly or covertly woo and flatter you, while they pepper you with gifts and innuendos, you have to admit that being courted is good for ones’ spirits.
But, you still end up comparing sometimes. Still end up wishing the right one loved you right.
